Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Friend today, gone tomorrow

As an adult I haven't really experienced a death of a friendship. I've lost contact with people over time but it was due to life - schedules, marriages, moving, babies, etc. This weekend & yesterday I found out that someone who I really enjoyed spending time with actually has issues with me. It turns out I'm not allowed to have conversations with her husband (we hang out with these people as a group - lots of couples, some singeltons (I love that phrase from Briget Jones) only her. The thing is; I viewed both of them as good friends and it hurts. Obviously it doesn't hurt her as she didn't value our friendship anyways (or what I thought was a friendship). The thing is, I don't think it's females in general that shouldn't talk to her husband, I think it's just me. I'm married, my husband and I have a great relationship. She's younger, has a great job, she's very pretty - I can't see how I would be a threat to her (or anyone for that matter - LOL).

Frankly I find this odd. I've always been a person who likes to talk to everyone in a social group - women, men, kids, married, single, old, young. You can learn things and enjoy yourself. For example; I had the best time at a Halloween party running door to door with one of my friend's young daughters as she walked with the rest of the group and her youngest child. My old room mates parents would come to stay with us and I loved sitting in the living room chatting away with them. I have great friends at my office who are male. I just don't get it.

What really sucks is that most likely I will see this person in the group setting, and I'll have to be nice to her as I've always been (because otherwise everyone else will know something is up and I don't want to cause anymore drama).

I guess the friendship I thought I had never was.

Can you have a funeral for a friendship that only existed on your side?

Why does this feel like this person took her ball and went home and I'm still standing there waiting for her to throw the ball.

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